“I don’t think artist should make albums unless they got something to say. at this point, hip hop, its still a young genre. y’know? we’ve never seen anyone grow up in hip hop. i think that if you make great music, that its ageless, its colorless, its doesn’t have a genre, it doesn’t have a gender, y’know. male and female like it, black and white like it. young and old like it. as long as you’re attached to a true emotion. i still represent hip hop, i represent the culture. i see my albums, and i see what i do as part of as a collective, not outside of it. not like this is jay-z and everything else is just hip hop. i believe in music. good music and bad music. i don’t believe in the lines and the words that separate music. y’know, like pop music, rap music, and r&b, and country music. its all music. you just use different instruments like it all the same thing it all comes from creativity, it comes from your joy, your pain. whatever you draw to create into these songs, it comes from the same place. new york, new york. this is my foundation. its the center of my growth. the muse for my art. its where i grew up. its you know, the thing i have a lot of pride in.” —JayZ

(via inspirationdelight)

NOTE* A couple guys that were sitting behind me brought this subject to my attention, and best believe that i’m not a hip-hop head but this is just adding to their conversation about claiming what real hip hop is. Again, i ain’t claiming i’m a hip-hop head, this is just my perspective. This is just my two cents added to the conversation that came up today.  

What did Lil Wayne, T-pain, 50 cent, or Soulja Boy do thats so “Hip-hop”. Tell me, Why do they deserve to be on the radio? because they have a catchy beat? Because they talk about sex, drugs, money, or partying? What’s so hip-hop about that? Tell me what do the artists on the radio have that makes their music better than Wale, Dumbfoundead, Pacific Division or J. Cole? What about Chelsea, EPonym, Esta, Infinity Funk Project, Jeff Bernat, DJ Agana, Warren Aguilar, Wordplay, Nefarious, Mosaek, Decypher, Slik d,  and many, many more? What about A tribe called quest? What don’t they have that isn’t suitable for the hype or recognition? I guess it’s just because they’re too good for the radio, they’re just too good.  But tell me now, What makes the artists on the radio so “sick” or “dope”? What makes them so good when all they are is garbage. (Generally speaking about their music). In all honesty, their music is trash to my ears. It’s disturbing to see that the majority of the young generation think hip hop is what they hear on the radio. And i mean no disrespect, i mean if you like them.. cool story, bro but don’t go around saying that what you hear on the radio is real hiphop, especially if you’re going to say if to my face. I’m not claiming i’m a hip hop head because i’m not but do trust that there’s a difference between hip hop and hip pop. 

(Source: inspirationdelight)

(It’s a long Read. Apologies for the Bad Grammar.)

My Rights Of Passage Essay

No pulse, no breathing, no more life. So much pain, tears, and mourning. When you lose a loved one it can emotionally or physically affect the way you think. As I stood there, watching my family and friends cry, I couldn’t help but feel my heart sink. Looking up at the alter there laid a casket with a loved one in it. To be honest, it scared me. The line “life is precious.” kept running through my mind.  I got scared and I kept questioning myself. What if I was in that position? What about my parents, siblings, friends, or relatives? It seemed as if my life flashed by in a few blinks. Six loved ones gone and six funerals I’ve attended. I’ve lost that many people who mean a lot to me all in the past 14 years. I was once so ignorant of life. I took everything for granted. I didn’t really appreciate life as much as I should have. That was until it finally hit me that life is short. Now, because of this, I’ve become more appreciative, I surround myself around more uplifting people. My happiness has increased, I expect less and I accept more. I take chances if I get one. I’ve realized that the nature of life, that’s what, made me the person I am today. If anything, living with an open mind has changed everything about me.

I forgave them for leaving me on a empty note. It took 6 funerals for me to finally realize that everything happens for a reason. If anything, I believe that all the funerals I’ve attended were for myself to learn that I should be grateful for what I’ve been given. “You don’t know what you have until it’s gone.” This quote scares me because of how true it is. We often aren’t thankful for what we’ve received because we don’t care or we just don’t realize how much we need it. Losing someone impacted my life in so many ways. The funeral I remember most was my uncle’s. He was my dad’s brother in-law. I think I remember this the most because it was the first time I’ve seen my parents, relatives, and friends cry that much. I was only 8 or 9 at the time. The funeral was held in southern California, where my uncle lived after moving from Vietnam. It didn’t hit me that my uncle was gone until a couple years after the funeral due to the fact I was too young to understand death. I finally accepted that he was gone… that everyone who have passed away is gone. On the year anniversaries of their deaths, there is usually ceremony held at a relative’s house where we pray for our losses. Those are the days where it usually hits me hard. I usually cope with it by listening to soothing music or just think. I guess you can say I become an insomniac that night. It hard to lose someone but even harder to accept that you’ve lost them. I’ve become more grateful for what I have and I’ve learn that everything was given to me for a purpose. 

I’ve been raised as a Catholic. Therefore, I believe that there’s so much power to a prayer. During the time where I couldn’t feel any lower after the lost of a loved one, I would simply pray. I would pray that God would welcome my loved ones to heaven and that he would keep them safe. I feel like that’s the most I can do to keep me moving forward. The death of a loved one made my faith grow stronger. I’ve come to the fact that no matter what happens, life still goes on. I’ve realized that life is too short to be anything but happy. I’ve become someone with fewer expectations so I could accept more. Acceptance is a hard thing to do sometimes, especially when it comes to lost of a loved and I think I’ve become a more happier person accepting things. My faith grew once I learned to accept. I was introduced to a Vietnamese Catholic Youth Group in Everett, and I’ve been attending for the past 8 years now. I believe that I owe them so much. They’re the reason why I realize and accept more often. They’re one of the main reasons for my optimism. Overall, they’re the reason that my faith has grown. They give me so much hope in life. I’ve grown with them to the point where we’re basically family. I was blessed with the opportunity to get to know them and they’re lifelong friends without a doubt, this is only the beginning. Everything we’ve been through together defines the perfect family. There is no same blood that runs through our veins. I feel as if we passed that “best friends” mark a long time ago, we’re technically siblings now. My faith is important to me, it’s what keeps me going, and it’s my muse. The people in my youth group are my muse. I’m a strong believer in Christ, and I believe that he will never put me through anything that he knows I can’t handle. I know if I ever run into a problem, it was for a reason. That’s originally where my “everything happens for a reason” mentality came from.  I was once so close-minded that I didn’t want to go to church because I didn’t understand and I didn’t know anything, but now that I’ve learned more I want to attend church, I want to learn more about the Bible so I can forgive, accept, and realize.

We’re given plenty of chances throughout our life. We’re often offered to do good in the world. I was given the chance to realize everything from a different perspective or might I say, I was more blessed. I was given the chance to introduce myself to a amazing person. He’s like my own brother. He’s possibly one of the most inspirational people, if anything I owe a big thank you to him. His name is Justin and currently a student at UCI. If anything, I believe that I call him my brother because he’s older and much wiser, he’s taught me so much about life. He’s helped me through a lot with problems in my life whether it was family, friends, school, or homework. He’s become an important part of my life because I’ve always said “family first” and he’s become a older brother to me, and that’s kind of a big deal to me. I’ve always wanted an older brother and I think Justin portrays this image amazingly. I understand that people come and go, that’s why I don’t expect too much from people. I’ve lost too many people and I’ve realized that I can only keep calm and carry on. I don’t really care about anything, I’m just glad I have the chance to live. That’s the best gift I could receive, life. We’ve gotten the chance to do so much and sometimes we turn it down and sometimes we strive for it. I’ve surrounded myself by all types of people. Not once, however have I gotten pressured because I know my morals and they know where I stand. The opportunity that I got to meet them is great, and if they left me hanging or if they’re still with me, then all I have to say is thank you. Everyone was put in my life for a reason, whether it was to teach me something, for me to learn from them, inspire me, or whatever. I live with no regrets, I move forward and I take chances to do well  if I’m given the chance because I realized I was one a stubborn and selfish person who refused to help out and didn’t care just about anything but herself and I just don’t want to be that person anymore.

“if we accepted the fact that we could die anytime, we’d lead our lives differently” said Morrie Schwartz. Complaining about how hard things are is only going to make your mentality worse. Everything that has happened to me in these past years has changed me. Everything happens for a reason because we give it a reason. I make choices everyday and on some days I’ll make the wrong choice but that doesn’t make me a wrongful person. I’m learning from it. Death, it’s a scary thing for some people, but to me I’m not so fearful about it. No, I’m not waiting for death, it’s because I’ve accepted the fact that I’m going to die at one point in life and that’s why I want to live like theres no tomorrow. I live with no regrets and although I’ll come along a few bumpy roads, I’ll make through it. “This shall Pass” is stamped into my brain because everything  will pass, problems, life, friends, family. Everything and anything. I was once told by a good friend from my youth group that “nothing lasts forever, so live it up, sleep it out, laugh it off, and avoid the problems, take chances and never regret because at one point everything you did, was exactly what you wanted.” That quote has strangely impacted my life because one, it came from her. She’s amazing and she’s only a couple years older than me. She has a mind of a woman who’s experienced everything, she’s ridiculously intelligent. And two, because this quote will forever be in my life. I don’t forget quotes easily because I love quotes that have a meaning to my life. I choose to live life happily because life gives me a chance. I was once so ignorant of life. Stupidity was at its max and rudeness was what defined me. I’m a change person. I’m not who I used to be, I’m a lot more mature. I’ve grown and I think differently, I’m honestly just waiting for more people to realize that because I don’t want to be known as that past person, I’m different. I want to be known for changing and doing something good. The ability to understand life isn’t as easy as we think it is, but if you try, you could see life from a whole different view and you wouldn’t want to go back. -Michelle Dinh Rest in Peace Uncle Toan. 

(Source: inspirationdelight)

Breakeven - The Script

I’m still alive but I’m barely breathing. Just prayin’ to a god that I don’t believe in, cause I got time while she got freedom, cause when a heart breaks no it don’t break even Her best days will be some of my worst. She finally met a man that’s gonna put her first. While I’m wide awake she’s no trouble sleeping. Cause when a heart breaks no it don’t breakeven.

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you, And what am I supposed to say when I’m all choked up that you’re ok I’m falling to pieces.

They say bad things happen for a reason. But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding cause she’s moved on while I’m still grieving And when a heart breaks no it don’t breakeven. 

Oh you got his heart and my heart and none of the pain. You took your suitcase, I took the blame. Now I’m try’na make sense of what little remains cause you left me with no love and no love to my name.

What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you and

What am I suppose to say when I’m all choked up that you’re ok

(Source: inspirationdelight)

illmillion: Letter To My Next

dear whoever you may be, as i’m writin this down you might say i’m crazy, but whatever you perceive or see what may seem, as a simple letter, it’s more like, hey we should be together, we’d be amazing, i don’t care what others think, or what others see, let’s juss have each other be, whatever we wanna be, or maybe another scene, from the notebook, i hope i’m not another creep, okay, let’s begin when the time’s right, i juss want you the highlight of my life, & if my life’s in your life, then it’d be more like what we could have, is twilight, then we could shine like a new moon, & if you say i’m cute, then you cute too, nobody would be cuter than we is, nobody can get in the way of our eclipse, it’ll be abreaking dawn, you know what drake said, you’re the prettiest, i hope you don’t take it wrong, he couldn’t say it best, i won’t say you wrong, but i will see you wrong, cuz you will stay a ten, i say so many times that you’re beautiful, if i could love you to death, it’s till my funeral, i can’t promise that, i don’t make promises, i’ll commit to it, but thas obvious, if you’re my next, you’re better than my exes, i’m so grateful i sent them to the exit, i bet my friends would come to a consensus, you’re way better & will be my best since, i’m happy you’ve been finally let in, i’m no jacob but i could be your best friend, & your boyfriend, i’m no poison, w/ me i’m sure you’ll be joyous, i’m sure i’ve made the right choice, since i don’t believe you only like me for my nice voice, i’d treat you like a goddess, but i see you like to be modest, but to be honest, it’s okay, cuz i’m sure you’ll be accepting in your own way, i would drop any female, & drop any details,  that’ll reveal that you’re not any female, not anybody that i would pass by, if you ask why,  i am not at liberty, you’ll have to consider me, i’ll even write our names in calligraphy, juss to prove it’s written, cuz listen, i don’t wanna write that you wouldn’t be into me, thas juss somethin that i don’t do, been three years since i’ve gotten to know you, i would say we’re somethin thas untouched, f it were possible, i’d make you my one love, but, it is what it is, & what it is, that i’m glad you’re my friend, & we’re kinna close, actually, we’re kinna shy, but we kinna don’t, act like we would kinna would be, a couple is what we kinna should be, but i apologize, it’s juss a suggestion, it’s kinna like another intention, it’s like a kinna sorta maybe, like how you’re either, wonderful or amazing, or i’m crazy,  let’s say you could be my girlfriend or my baby, sincerely, timothy him, illmillion.

Tamara has never listened to hip-hop, never danced to the rhythm of rain drops or fallen asleep to a chorus of chirping crickets. She has been deaf for as long as I’ve been alive. And ever since the day I first turned five, my father has said, “Joshua, nothing is wrong with Tamara. God just makes some people different.“ And at that moment, those nine letters felt like hammers swung gracefully by unholy hands to shatter my stained-glass innocence into shards that can never be pieced back together or do anything more than suffer the silence between my sister and I. I waited with patient, numberless years anticipating the second her ears would open like lotuses and allow my sunlight sentences to seep into her insides, make her remember all those conversations we must have had in heaven back when god hand picked us siblings soul centuries ago. I still remember her twentieth birthday. Readilyrecalled my awe-struck 11 year old eyes as i watched deaf men and women of all ages dance inunison to the vibration those speakers booming so loud that i imagined angles chastising their worship with such beautiful blasphemy until you have seen a deaf girl, know nothing of passion There was a barricade between us that i never took the time to destroy, never even took the time to pick up a book and look for the sign sister, for family, for goodbye, I will see you again, someday. Remember the face of your little brother. It is only now I see that I was never willing to put in the extra effort to love her properly. So as the only person in my family who is not fluent in sign language, I’ve decided to take this time to apologize. Tamara, I am sorry for my silence. But true love knows no frequency, and so I will use these hands to speak for you, that can never be contained from the boundaries of sound waves, out shouts at the top of my fingertips as they relay messages directly to your soul. I know that there is no poem that can make up for all the time we have lost, so, please, if you can, just listen. Thank you.

(Source: inspirationdelight)

She is a lopsided soliloquy; a wounded symphony, played by an orchestra of her mother’s ‘I told you so’s. A tatted woman who bleeds like an oak tree. Her life story, is just a sandpaper love song written on a napkin full of all the reasons why no one should ever try to hug the rain; you always end up soaking wet, and by yourself. She is a rusty faucet dripping self esteem that falls quicker than short skirts in motels, when the sun blinks for too long. You see, when confidence hits the ground, it echos like sin in a room full of God, and I can hear her coming a mile away. She has violin strings for legs, a graveyard of awkward treble clefs buried in her knees, and I can see the suffering inside of the concert of her walk. Her footsteps - they sound like the ignition to a father’s car, the day that he decided that he was too thirsty to pour water on his own seed. So, when she calls me ‘Daddy’, I never really get excited because I know it’s just a title that she gives to branches in her life that are destined to be abducted by the wind. She comes over on Wednesdays. She walks into my room like a question that neither one of us has the courage to ask. You know, sometimes words, they get too heavy to sit on the shelves that we’ve built inside of our mouths. You know, sometimes our actions, they join hands, and they become phrases that are too complicated for lips to say out loud. So, instead, we just liberate our flesh, letting skin speak on our behalf, the language of those who are just as afraid of commitments as they are of being alone, and we speak it like it’s our native tongue. Honestly, I can’t tell you her favorite color, her middle name, or what her face looks like with the lights on. All I know is that we are both allergic to the exact same things: compliments, the word beautiful, and someone saying ‘I love you’ with arms full of acceptance and sincerity on their breath, and sometimes I wanna ask what she keeps in the luggage underneath her eyes. Sometimes I wanna ask if those bags ever get too heavy for her face, but instead, I let those questions sand castle inside of my stomach. I amputate the parts of me that are growing fond of her smell. I wait for her to leave, and then I wash my sheets.

Eva: “You don’t know nothing. You don’t know the pain we feel. You don’t know what we gotta do. You gotta know respect for how we livin’. You got us sitting here, teaching us this grammar shit and then we have to go out there again. What do you know about that, huh? What are you doing in here that makes a god damn difference in my life? 

Ms. Gruwell: “You don’t feel respected. Is that what you’re saying, eva? Well, maybe you’re not. But to get respect you have to give it.”

Andre: “That’s bullshit. Why should i give my respect to you? Because you’re a teacher? I don’t know you. How do i know you’re not a liar standing up there? How do i know you’re not a bad person standing up there? I’m not just going to give you my respect because you’re called a teacher.”

Self Portrait - Blue Scholars

Rebel with a pen lettin off buckshots in threes. Rewriting what it is into what it ought to be. They made a mockery out of the possibility But under constant revision is the poem that I be.

Shorty feels oppression on his shoulders as he’s liftin it wonders why the elders always tell him not to question it. Conjuring the courage just to conquer whats been killin him. He says its fucked up cause he knows no other synonym. Hidden from the truth, seen youths turned to troops. Whos goal at 21 is to turn 22, true tuition’s too high and those with the privelage to pay don’t listen, it’s a shame, go figurin. The name of the father, the son and holy lyrics. I suppose those who know what I’m sayin when they hear it might rage against the system, or hate me for dissin. The house in which they live in as a slave to the rhythm but I walk the broken sidewalk paved with the magic of those who walk past it, just to survive traffic. If paybacks a bitch, then gravity’s a bastard. Avenues I used to call familiar turned backward. Rebel with a pen lettin off buckshots in threes. Rewriting what it is into what it ought to be.

I am proud to say that Our Group successfully did out prayer skit on stage in front of 1500+ People. I am overjoyed that we got the chance to be on stage and spread the message of God. Our prayer was based on the song “If we are the Body” - Casting Crowns.

The plot of the skit was based on a different person, out of the usual but the people around her would tease her and make fun of her and she couldn’t take it anymore and so she turned away from god and put on a mask and she was apart of the people who didn’t accept her being different. Later there comes in a homeless man, he stinks and so they shun him and make him go out on the road again. After that God reaches out and asks “ if we are the body.. Why aren’t His arms reaching? Why aren’t His hands healing? Why aren’t His words teaching? And if we are the body Why aren’t His feet going?” One person realizes his message and goes up to god, bows down, and takes off her mask to show here true self. She then convinces other people to go and take off their masks to reveal themselves. The whole point of this skit was to realize that we are all one body in christ, the lord, the giver of life. We are all human and that everyone should be accepted regardless. We have no right .. or we are in no position to look down upon someone because they’re “different” or because they’ve made a mistake or committed a sin. Thats what reconciliation is for. Break free, and be who you are! Don’t be afraid, God is with you. Don’t hold back and judge someone, you’re committing your own sin by doing so. Love one another as god Loves you.

I was blessed to be able to come here this weekend and share it with my youth group and over a thousand other strangers. I made new friends, i saw old friends, and i got to be with current friends. The vibe of being in a place with a thousand different people, knowing that we are all here for god is one of the best feelings in the world. Knowing that there are other people trying to break free and let go of sins and live a new life thats amazing, it lets me know that i’m not the only person.  Everything that went on was indescribably beautiful. Its hard to explain how i feel because its so overwhelming, in a good way. The way this convention makes you feel is just so good to be true. It lifts up your soul and gives you a new perspective. This is my 2nd year attending this and i’m just craving more, 2 days.. 1 year? Thats not enough! Its going to be tough waiting another year for this to come around but it is worth the wait. It gives us a year to change and it gives us a year to make a difference and come together to share our experiences with the crowd. The speakers that were up on stage were amazing. I can not under any circumstances explain how motivated and inspired i was. The heart beating inside of me has come to a conclusion that i am in love with my religion. They could have stood on stage and talked for hours about how god loves us or how we are all worth something, but instead they just stood up there and talked about life, personal experiences, changes, and everything that made them the person they are today. My goal as of today is to be a person on stage speaking to the crowd. I want to be in their position. I want to break free and become a better person. I can only do that with the help of god. Everything that was done this weekend, everything that happened was all worth it. I loved every second of it. All though it wasn’t as fun as last’s year i did enjoy it very much. Seeing old faces brought pure bliss to me. Being able to get closer to god and committing myself to him is one of the best things. I’m going to live a good life. I am going to break free. I am going to live a new life. I am going to become a better me. I’m sick an tired of this stubborn attitude towards everyone. I’m sick of feeling at my lowest when I know that god is with me all day. I am breaking free today. I am breaking free tomorrow. I am breaking free everyday.  

God, i love you. I am glad to be your daughter. Please forgive me for i have sinned and please help me break free from bad and carry on your word. Let me be someone my parents won’t be disappointed in. Let me be able to help out the needy, my arms are open to any opportunity of service, help. I am, with an open hear, mind, and soul all yours. Help me father, help me become a better person and let me break free. Amen. -Michelle. 

(Source: inspirationdelight)